I Punched a Girl: Part I

There was blood everywhere, and tears in her eyes.

God, that sounds like the chorus to a Hawthorne Heights song.

I didn’t mean to punch Shelby Waters in the face. I didn’t mean to break her nose. I didn’t even know I could break noses. I couldn’t even snap a pencil in two, which was pretty embarrassing when I tried in front of my sister, then the next day she told her whole second grade class.

Maybe I should back up.

I’ve been balls-to-the-wall in love with Shelby Waters for two years, ever since she transferred to my high school and lent me a pencil during sophomore year English. She smiled at me, and that was it. It was all over. I’ve never been able to look at another girl. I think I still have it. The pencil, I mean. It’s pink. Don’t tell her, though, ‘cause I don’t want her to think I’m a stalker. I’m not a stalker. I mean, I stare at her a lot, but I don’t wait outside her house in the rain dressed like the Unabomber.

(more…)

October 20, 2010 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Comedy, Fiction, Health, High School, Humor, Love, Romance, Uncategorized | Tags: 12th grade, awkward, awkwardness, beauty, blonde, blood, boobs, boy, broken, Cavan, chapter 1, Christina Hendricks, dildos, douche, eighth grade, fight, gay, girl, GPA, guys, Hawthorne Heights, high school, hit, hospital, hot, I Punched a Girl, love story, Mannequin, marching band jacket, middle school, nose, nurse, part I, polo, punch, rain, Ralph Lauren, school, senior, sex, Shelby, shit my cake says, stalker, study buddy, The Situation, Todd, tutoring, Unibomber, Waters | 3 Comments