Posts tagged “pictures

Friday the Cowteenth

Today is Friday the 13th, but it’s also National Cow Appreciation Day, which means free meals from Chick-Fil-A. The stipulation to the free food is that you have to dress up like a cow to get it. You can half-ass it and get a sandwich, or you can go full-cow and get an entire meal. Being poor and obsessed with Chick-Fil-A, I donned my best cowtfit and got my hooves on some delicious chicken. It got me thinking, though.

A while back, I wrote a post about fashion photo shoots on farms. It’s amazing that the world has so many crappy, pretentious farm photo spreads to offer, yet none that feature models posing as livestock. It’s a void that clearly needs to be filled, and I decided to take on the responsibility of doing so in the first ever Shit My Cake Says Photo Shoot:

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Sappy Graduation Post, Well, It’s Not That Sappy, but Whatever, It’s a Graduation Post but It’s Mostly About Sherman and Yes This Whole Sentence Is the Title of This Post.

You’re not cool if you don’t recognize the guy in this picture.

I graduated today, only not. Technically, I graduated early. Impressive, no? The answer actually is no because I only graduated a semester early, and honestly, it was an accident. I didn’t mean to be so damn efficient in my college career.

That’s a lie. I was not at all efficient in my college career, but in high school I did dual credit stuff at a community college so I could hang out with potheads who had animal hoarding problems. But that’s a story for another time.

Because I took those community college classes as a teen with misplaced anger issues, I didn’t have to go to college for as long as I thought I would. My plan was to go to Austin College (not in Austin) for a year or so, then transfer to a school that actually offered a program I was interested in. I swore I would not graduate from Austin College. I refused. I was going somewhere better.

I never transferred, and thank God for that.

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