It’s Christmas Eve! You know what that means. Last-minute shopping! Many of you have yet to find that perfect gift for everyone on your list, but you’re in luck! There’s one universally loved gift that suits everyone: the cat sweater!
I’ve made a list of a few beautiful cat sweaters that everyone can appreciate. Your gift will touch the recipient so much, he or she might cry!
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December 24, 2010 | Categories: Awkward, Holidays, Humor, Uncategorized, WTF | Tags: cat sweaters, cats, children, Christmas, friends, fur, grandma, Holidays, relatives, sextuplets, shit my cake says, siamese, sweaters, WTF | 2 Comments »
Black Friday was a couple of weeks ago, but that doesn’t mean America isn’t still in a fight-to-the-death mindset when it comes to holiday shopping. It’s dangerous out there, and unless you’re equipped with a thousand tranquilizer darts and copies of O Magazine to take on the housewives, your life could be in danger. It seems grim, but there’s good news. I’ve compiled a list of gadgets and gobbledygook for everyone on your Christmas list that you can order online, so you don’t have to risk your life in the midst of holiday shopper crowds.
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December 6, 2010 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Food, Holidays, Humor, Oprah, Pop Culture, Uncategorized, WTF | Tags: 1865, 700, adventure, annoying, aunt, baby shaving, bitch, blades, bookworm, boring, cats, Christmas, Christmas list, cranky, crotchety, emo, emo kid, family, fat, fly, gifts, Gillette, Going Rogue: An American Life, grizzly bear chair, Holidays, hunting, husband, irritating, knit, lackluster, leiderhosen, Life Alert, love, man, men, Michel Lichtenstein, modern art, morbidly obese, mother in law, Museum of Unnatural History, obligated, obligation, old lady, personality, pillow, presents, pumpkin, razor, redneck, relative, safari, safari hat, Sarah Palin, scholar, shopping, slut, son, soup, soup bowl, statue, sweater, Teeth, travel, turkey hat, Ultimate Man Razor, uncle, unicorn tears, vacation, vagina dentada, weird, whore, wrinkle cream, XXL | Leave A Comment »
After a car ride engulfed in awkwardness, we pulled into St. Bartholomew’s Hospital of Beaver Falls, PA.
When Shelby had asked if we could listen to some music, I’d attempted the whole cliché as-she-reaches-for-the-radio-my-hand-will-brush-hers thing. Unfortunately, when we both reached for the radio, I stopped paying attention to the road and swerved into oncoming traffic.
Blasting car horns on all sides sounded as a sky blue Mercedes barely missed us. My tires screeched as I swerved us back into the right lane. Shelby looked like a scared rabbit, wide eyes and flared nostrils. When I caught my reflection in the rearview mirror, I looked like an even more scared rabbit.
“Whoops,” I said, trying to play if off like it was nothing, but I felt like she could hear me sweating.
She shot me a terrified glance, then turned on the radio.
“Trying to be my best, when I fall, it’s a mess!” screeched through my shoddy speakers.
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December 3, 2010 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Comedy, Fiction, High School, Humor, Love, Pop Culture, Romance | Tags: awkward, bloody nose, car crash, Cavan, concussion, fiction, Hannah Montana, high school, hospital, I Punched a Girl, janitor, love, Miley Cyrus, part 2, pop star, puke, radio, romance, Shelby Waters, shit my cake says, short story, vomit, zombie | Leave A Comment »
